It was just this past Wednesday the 18th when I was scrolling through Blogger and reading I LIKE TO FORK MYSELF, Daul Kim's blog of personal musings. According to the Telegraph, the model committed suicide in her apartment in Paris the following morning of the 19th.
Kim's blog was completely unedited and written from stream of thought. A collection of personal musings, you might say, and it worked. I wasn't a religious reader, but I would check it from time to time and empathize with her random, deeply personal postings. I suppose the real reason why I didn't read it every day is because, although refreshing, it was slightly depressing - unlike usual model's narcissistic blogs - and a true outpouring of the soul.
Two years ago, on April 16, 2007, a seventeen-year-old Kim posted "say hi to my living condition" in reference to her shared models' apartment in New York. An excerpt below:
"i was really sad so its making me feel bit depressed
i think its worse nowdays cos i really didnt miss home when i was like 13 and traveling,
but im still 17 and maybe some ppl think im old enough but really all these years
traveling and missing school and missing real home time is effecting me now
i dont have much memories from school cos i quit school when i was 15 going on 16
and i home schooled . but even when i was 13 i didnt really have friends my age
and i had like 3 friendsf rom highschool and i still dont have friends my age.
it made me be more mature but at the same time sometimes i feel sad and i just hope
i dont become like michal jackson and build neverland when im like 30 something
and be crazy and get plastic surgery and molest children."
I subscribed to her YouTube videos, and "A sentimental journey (i have been crying for 17 years)" was uploaded two years ago; I believe it documents how much of an outsider she felt she was:
And then, on November 14, 2009, she posted "say hi to self-reliance", dissecting Ralph Waldo Emerson's famous essay. An excerpt:
"It contains the most solid statement of one of Emerson's repeating themes, the need for each individual to avoid conformity and false consistency, and follow his or her own instincts and ideas. Emerson's ideas are considered a reaction to a commercial identity; he calls for a return to individual identity."
I could sit here and dissect Kim's beautiful blog, post by post, line by line, word by word, but I choose not to because there is truly no need. Kim was a beautiful, soulful young girl with a fascinating career behind and ahead of her.
She will be missed.
Photo: MODELS
